Lots of New Things

So, I'm not even sure where to begin...
I started school. My last semester of classes for undergraduate work.
Vertical Access is back!
My job has changed quite a bit.
Oh, and I'm engaged.

Yep, I'm back in the saddle again. School has begun and there's nothing I can do to stop it now. I'm not even currently sure what to think about my new semester. It's looks deceivingly easy compared to my past semesters. Now don't misunderstand. It will still be tough, mostly because of my other obligations. But it doesn't look impossible. I do, however, always always always get overwhelmed at the beginning. I look at my syllabus and freak out. I hate seeing every single assignment layed out before me. I'm an overdoer, so naturally I want to do it all at once. I would live so much better if only my teachers would give me one thing at a time to work on. But they don't do that. So I will learn to cope yet again.

Vertical Access is finally back! I'm so incredibly excited for this next year. For you who don't know, Vertical Access is the college ministry of High Street Baptist Church. We reach out to college students--mainly focusing on Missouri State, Drury, Evangel, Baptist Bible College, and OTC. We meet Wednesday nights and Sunday mornings, as well as special events and get-togethers. We have totally revamped Vertical Access this past year and we are praying that we followed Jesus in these efforts. Our goal as a community is to "magnify the glory of God by providing an environment for Christians to thrive spiritually and engaging people who aren't Christians with the gospel." I truly believe we are closer to this purpose than ever before. If you want to learn more about Vertical Access or High Street, check us out or just ask me! You can always comment below!
https://www.facebook.com/va.hsbc
www.highstreet.org

So I'm still at South Haven, but my role is constantly changing here. Originally, I wasn't going to work here this semester, but I love it too much and my boss is too great. But because of my schedule and restrictions due to VA, I am playing a much different part. My main focus until next February is Upward Basketball and Cheerleading. I will be heading this up single-handedly but I'm ready. This is something I know I can manage and it will be good. Last semester it was a tad chaotic because three people were trying to make it work, and then add in some volunteers and no one had a clue who did what when. Now, it is my task to get things done, organize, and deligate tasks so that we know exactly who is doing what when.
The hardest part about this semester is backing off of our neighborhood program because of Vertical Access. I know where my heart lies and where I am called, but I want so badly to be Super Girl and do it all. I have so many relationships with this middle schoolers and I hate that now I have to leave early every week in order to be at VA and preform my president duties. I know it's the right thing, but leaving will always be tough. Which again reminds me that I will leave this job in February and have to move on. I know it's what has to happen, but it won't be an easy time at all.

And finally, the most shocking news of all... I'm engaged! I'm engaged to the most incredible, Godly man I can imagine. I'm sure you hear this from many girls, but Taylor is the guy that I convinced myself I would never find. I saw relationships like my pastor's and his wife's marriage and saw it's beauty and value, but thought it was only for a select few... and that didn't include me. Luckly, Jesus saw fit to give me a man that draws me closer to Christ before himself. That challenges me in the best ways. And to quote Paul, often becomes the "thorn in my side" when I begin to fall away. He leads me spiritually and protects me physically and emotionally. And now he is going to be mine til death do we part!

Taylor and I actually have a wedding website where you can view pictures, read our stories, and find out all sorts of things! It's actually pretty fun to look at. I'm constantly changing and updating it because it's not totally done, but please check it out!
www.theknot.com/wedding/Taylor-and-Krysta

Time Really Isn't On Your Side. It's His.

"Time is what we want most, but what we use worst." -William Penn

"Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save."       -Yale Richmond

"Those who make the worst of their time most complain about its shortness." – La Bruyere

"Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is."  -Ephesians 5:15-17


Time. We all want more. We all waste it.
I know, because I have been lately.

And I worry about it so much! It's not like it will slow down or speed up just from my thoughts.
"And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?" (Matthew 6:27)

Lately I've been caught in the worry of my last year of college. I worry that I may push myself too far. Spread myself too thin. Try to do too much.

But then again....

I think about all the time I waste. I think about the moments I'm laying around on my phone or watching a silly TV show. I think about the moments I'm staying up late doing basically nothing, then complain about how tired I am. I complain about my busyiness, all the while spending my time idiotically.

God knows our limits. He gave us 24-hour days for a reason. He knows we are only capable of so much each hour, each day, each week. He knows my capabilites and calls me to live within them. We can only do so much. But then He warns us about how we should spend our time.

You won't find anywhere in the Bible which tells me to lay around and spend my time selfishly. Yes, we are to take time for God above all else, which can mean a relaxing afternoon spent reading His word--but that isn't selfish. Selfish is my zombie hours in which I spend watching "Say Yes to the Dress," without thinking an intellegent thought or doing a productive activity. These things do not relax me. They are a false sense of comfort in which I can so easily trust in.

Jesus says, "Come to me and I will give you true rest" (Matt 11:28-30). He knows I am most filled in Him. He knows only He can comfort my weary bones and restore my tired heart. Jesus understands the burden of our busy lives. He never intended for us to get bogged down in the crap we put ourselves through, but He offers restoration anyway.

I am so challenged to use my time for wisely.

God calls me to spend my time loving others. Not myself.
God calls me to spend my time serving others. Not serve my selfish desires.
God calls me to spend my time telling the world about Him. Not stay in my comfortable bubble.
God calls me to spend my time becoming more like Jesus every single day. Not to worship myself.
God calls me to spend my time glorifying His Name. Not to make much of myself.

Now when I get worried about time, I have to take a step back and look about how I'm spending it. More than likely, it's not more time I need...I need more Jesus.

My Life Could Be a Waste

Is my life a waste?

What am I doing?

Where do I fit in?

Could it all be for nothing?

What is my pupose?

Have you ever had these thoughts? Have you ever sat down and really thought about where you are putting your time and energy? Where your heart lies?

Have you ever thought about what people would say at your funeral? What you will be remembered for?

Well, I have.

And I've come to one realization. That if one truth in my life is wrong, my life is a joke. My life is wasted. And that's exactly how I want it.

I want my life so centered on the life of Christ, that if Jesus turns out to be just a myth, my life was wasted. Now with this thought, I have a long ways to go. I still have a lot I need to surrender to Jesus and a lot more I can do for Him while I'm here, but I'm willing to accept that challenge. I would rather have a life some would say is wasted on Jesus, than a life which no one will remember 10 years after I'm gone. Here's how I see it...

My grandparents are two of my best friends. But the amount I know about my grandparent's life is not as much as I would like. And the amount I know about my great-grandparents is even less. I don't know if they were champion athletes, great friends, amazing cooks, beautiful dancers, brillant writers, or just quiet folk who stayed at home. I have no idea. Things like that fade away quickly. People forget. People move on with their own lives and forget to talk about you.

"Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God." (Isaiah 40:28)

Everlasting God.

We are temporary. We are here for just awhile and then gone (James 4:14). And in the midst of the great big world and the 7 billion other people on this planet, the chances of anyone remembering me past my grandkids is slim. That's sort of depressing, isn't it? You can see how it can be so easy for our lives to feel like a waste? But don't forget...

Everlasting God.

So how do we make our lives not be a waste? We live for Him and Him alone. And though no one will remember my name, I can leave a legacy in my family that was started well before me. I can leave a legacy of loving and serving the Lord. Decades down the road in my lineage, my family could still be believing in Jesus because of the love my grandkids had, the love my children had, the love I had, the love my parents had, the love my grandparents had, great-grandparents and so on. That thought alone makes me want to cry and thank God for the opportunity. But then add to it the people we can love outside our family. The people we can tell about Jesus and show His love in a tangible way to. Those people could start a legacy in their families as well, all because you lived a life for God!

So my life is a waste, uh? The majority of my time and energy goes into serving. I spend my time loving kids, creating devotions, hanging out with "the least of these," leading or participating in Bible studies, being in leadership in ministries, and studying to create a life which helps others. Now make no mistake, I don't say those things to boast in my abilities. In my mind, I'm actually missing the mark and I could do so much more. I say these things to show you and remind myself that if this "Jesus thing" is fake, if it turns out to be a big joke, my life is a total and complete waste of time. Everything I do and put my time into would be for nothing. I'm banking my entire life and the future of my family to come that God came down in the form of man, died on a cross for my sins, and is now very much alive.

When I die, no one will remember me. But I hope everyone who thinks of me, immediately thinks of Christ. And if that happens, my life is not a waste.

Jesus, A Whore, and Me

Besides the Gospel of the cross, if I had to pick one single story from the Bible to only read the rest of my life, this story would be a top contender. This is a story of love, of grace, of mercy, of truth, of forgiveness, of sacrifice, of hypocrisy, of sin, of life, of me, and most importantly, of Jesus.

The Adulteress Woman -- or for us today, the whore.

So there's a crowd. A big crowd of people and among them is Jesus. That's no coincidence He's there.
Because a group of scribes and Pharisee (aka. the uber religious folks of the time who love their rules and self-righteousness) enter the scene. Dragging a woman. Dragging a whore.

So this sounds harsh, right? To call her a whore. But she is an adulterer. Is that a better term? She slept with a married man. She's a cheater. A home wrecker. The other woman. Who reading this thinks cheating is okay? Who wants to be cheated on? Exactly. This isn't exactly the town's saint. She isn't their best friend right now.

Side note here: How would you feel being this woman? We all have sin. We all have secrets. This woman was caught in hers. And not only was she caught, she was being dragged like a dead animal in front of a large crowd with her sin practically stamped on her forehead. What if your sin was exposed in this sort of way? What if your darkest secret was revealed publicly? Just a thought.

But here are these religious guys who are literally dragging this woman to the crowd to humiliate her and give her punishment for her crime. For in this day, adultery is punishable by stoning. Stoning isn't a quick punishment. It hurts. And hurts for a long time. These men, by law, have the right to throw rocks at this woman in public until she dies. If that's by bleeding out, a head wound, or internal trauma, it doesn't matter. They keep going until she's dead.

There's still an ulterior motive going on here. They don't bring her to the crowd and just start throwing rocks like they could of. They ask Jesus a question. "The Law commands we stone such a woman. So what do you say?"

"So what do you say?"

They are trying to trap Jesus in His own words. Jesus basically has two obvious choices here. He can say stone her or He can say not to. He can either be the bad guy who wouldn't be seen as loving and living what He preaches, or He can disobey the law. Either way, He seems pretty screwed, right? The Pharisees thought so too. They thought they caught Him. They thought they had Him backed in a corner.

Good thing our God is bigger and way smarter.

Jesus answers them, "Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone."

Gotcha.

And one by one, oldest to youngest, the stones are dropped. The men, ashamed, walk away. These are the religious men, and they were caught in their own trap set for Jesus. Instead of exposing the sin of this woman, their sin was exposed as well. But it doesn't end here.

"Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?"
"No one, Lord"
"Neither do I condemn you. Go and sin no more."

I'm one of those people who thinks Jesus smiled and did that a lot. And when I picture Him saying, "Where are your accusers?" He's got to be smiling or at least smirking. Because what comes next is life-changing.

"Neither do I condemn you. Go and sin no more."

Don't forget her crime. She's a whore. She probably ruined a marriage. Maybe many. And Jesus doesn't condemn her. That doesn't make what she did okay. Not at all. If He had simply forgiven her and left it at that, someone may assume that. Someone may assume that Jesus let's these things go. But He goes on to say, "Go and sin no more."

God doesn't love our sin. God hates sin. He hates sin so much that He knew something had to be done because us trying to fulfill the Law on our own just wasn't working. Us trying to meet this holy standard wasn't quite doing it. But Jesus can. God doesn't love us just the way we are. Because we are sin. God loves us IN SPITE of who we are. The world labeled this woman as a whore. God hated the sin in this woman. But oh, if you don't see the love He has for her in this story, you missed the point. Jesus spared her from death. He saved her. And later in this beautiful story, He saves me, too.

From the Pharisees. In public. When I should have been the one dragged out, He was. When I should have been the one humiliated by my sin, He was. When I should have been the one beaten, He was. When I should have been the one punished with death, He was. When I should have been condemned, He was.

So at the end of the day, me and that whore have a whole lot in common.


**this devotion had a lot of help from the awesome Chris Kuykendall's sermon at Camp Hope this weekend**

Stuck in My Head

Today, I cannot stop singing. And I cannot stop listening to one song. Don't you hate when that happens??
Today I don't hate it at all. And I want to share it with you.

In case you can't watch the video, I'll put the lyrics down below.
I'm currently doing a devotion with Taylor all summer on the book of Isaiah, and man, does Isaiah know how to expose sin. I mean, he is a prophet and that's normally what they are good at, but he seems to be exceptionally good at displaying the Righteous Judge in His full glory. But with this judgement and wrath, comes the promise of hope. The promise that this sin will not overtake those who have genuine faith. The promise that He will return and make new His creation. The promise that He never fails.

******************************************************
City Harmonic - Holy (Wedding Day)

This is the story of Son of God hanging on the cross for me.
But it ends with a bride and groom and a wedding by a glassy sea.
Oh death, where is your sting?
Cause I'll be there singing, "Holy, holy, holy is the Lord."

This is the story of a bride in white waiting on her wedding day.
Anticipation welling up inside while the groom is crowned as King.
Oh death, where is your sting?
Cause we'll be there singing, "Holy, holy, holy is the Lord."

Holy, holy. Holy, holy. Holy, holy is the Lord Almightly.
Who was, and is, and is to come.

This is the story of Son of God hanging on the cross for me.
And it ends with a bride and groom and a wedding by a glassy sea.
This is the story of a bride in white singing on her wedding day
of the God who was, and is, and stand before a bride who sings,
"Holy, holy, holy is the Lord Almighty."

Good Food, Good Time

I love food. I workout to eat more. And I love eating as healthy as possible. It just tastes better and you feel better. Now, my most recently cooked meal was not the healthiest I've ever cooked by any means, but as a Chinese food substitute, it is way healthier than Hong Kong Inn. Not only was the food awesome though, but who I shared it with was even better. It was Taylor's last night in town for a week. Then he's back for one week and then gone again for 7. I hate distance. I suck at distance. But this is something I'm willing to fight for and give my fears to Jesus about. I mean, this could be an incredible opportunity for Taylor and I to truly rest in the presence and comfort of Christ alone.

Now for this food. It was a sort of quick decision to make a meal at home than to go out for our last little evening together. I love to cook and he loves to help so it only made sense to us to do it this way. Plus, everytime we cook it is always so good. We came up with the idea to make our own Chinese (and of course I had to add in vegetables!). I found a version of sweet & sour chicken online and we went to town on it. I got the recipe from Made It, Ate It, Loved It, but here it is!

CHICKEN:
3-5 chicken breasts (we used 6-7 tenderloins cause it's what we had and it still tasted great!)
salt and pepper (or anything else)
cornstarch to coat
2 eggs, beaten
canola oil

Rinse chicken, trim fats, and cut into 1-inch cubes. Season with salt and pepper. Dip each piece into the cornstarch, then into the egg. Heat oil in a large skillet and place the chicken in the skillet (duh!). Preheat your oven to 350 degrees. Finish cooking your chicken until browned. Then place the chicken in a baking dish and coat with the sauce.....

SAUCE:
3/4 cup sugar (we used white but I've heard brown works too)
4 tablespoons ketchup
1/2 cup white distilled vinegar
1 tablespoon soy sauce
1 teaspoon garlic salt (or more if you're me!)

Whisk everything until smooth. Pour evenly over the chicken in the baking dish. Turn chicken to coat and pop it in the oven for 30 minutes. Stir it half way through!!

Finally, eat it up!!

We enjoyed the chicken with brown rice and sauteed vegetables (zuchinni, mushrooms, onions, and green pepper) on the porch that evening. It was perfect with my green tea. It was perfect outside. It was perfect with him.
Afterwards we enjoyed a walk around downtown and one of our infamous trips to Walmart. Even Walmart shopping is fun with Taylor. Oh, and we got shaved ice. Because we get shaved ice just about every time we are together. It's just too good.

More later. Maybe tomorrow!

Long Time, No See

So, it's been awhile to say the least. I've told myself over and over I need to update this but life gets in the way from time to time. Well, actually finals and weddings get in the way. But that's been life for the last month. Let's start at the beginning.

I'm done with my junior year! Can you believe it? Yeah, me neither. I'm getting old. Almost 22. I'm done with all my big milestone birthdays. Minus like 40, where they say "over the hill," so I'm not exactly looking forward to that one. But next year I'll be a senior. Which means big decisions lie ahead. Like where to do my practicum for one. I've been offered one position, wanted another, and considering a life-changing one. Needless to say, I'm lost. Then comes graduate school decisions. Like where, how to pay for it, and where I'll go afterward. What I'll do afterward. Okay, well after this, excuse me while I go lay in my bed and each Fudge Brownie ice cream and forget the world. Haha, actually as scary as it is, I refuse to let fear sink me. My God is bigger than that and has a future far better than I deserve. I just have to be patient and obedient while He unravels it. Definitely easier said than done.

Next was the wedding. Don't fret. Not my own. I was the maid of honor in my roommates wedding. Did you know with being a maid of honor comes a lot of duties. Apparently it's a big deal. But I had a blast planning the bridal shower, bachelorette night, and lingerie party. Now, I'll be honest. After the mere help I put into this wedding, I am thoroughly ready to elope. Quick, easy, painless. But the wedding was beautiful. The bride was beautiful. The day couldn't have gone better.

"From Miss to Mrs" bridal shower!

Andrew and Taffeta!

Yes, the bridal party preformed a dance together!

The entire bridal party was pretty great.

Our group was just like a family. Love these girls so much.

Now, for the last part of my recent journey. Moving. First, it was Taffeta to Kansas City. We worked hard but her apartment looked flawless and organized at the end of the night. Then me. I moved out of the apartment and into a house with 4 other girls. Except not yet. I mean, I'm here. But I'm not. It's just a weird week but basically I'm living out of boxes for 2 weeks. And if you know much about me, you know this drives me crazy. I even unpack at hotels. I'm a settler. And the idea of my stuff sitting in the garage totally grosses me out. But somehow Jesus is making me more flexible than I've ever been. Maybe it's the recent wedding chaos, or the fact I'm getting older and seeing more of what's important, but I've been more easy-going and spontaneous than ever. Life is too great to get bent up about some boxes. Or craziness at work. Or the way my hair looks after one snip of a terrible hair stylist.

Yes, life is good. And God is greater.

I promise to start updating this thing more this summer. But this is all for now.